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Emergency Board of Review April 28th

According to an insider, April 28th will be a thrilling episode.

'The life coaches and Dr. Stan hold an emergency board of review to determine whether one of the women should be asked to leave the house. ,' she says. Mark you calendars for the 28th.

Spoilers for March 31 to April 11

The next two weeks will be thrilling on 'Starting Over'. Look at these spoilers:

3-31
Rachael is furious over the decision her aunt made after Rachael's mother passed away; Rhonda shows Bethany exactly how negative her self-criticisms are; Candy gets a surprise visit.

4-1
One of the women graduates; Iyanla sends Allison to the gym; an upcoming procedure terrifies Bethany.

4-4
Karen, the newest housemate, arrives; Tess learns a lesson about being judgmental; Vanessa grapples with the emotional effects of no longer being a star athlete.

4-5
Iyanla accuses Karen of finding comfort in drama; Rachael fears being entirely cut off from her family; three men compete for Bethany's attention

4-6
Rachael confronts her father and demands answers to the questions she has had since childhood; the housemates worry about Karen's emotional state; Allison meets an inspirational figure.

4-7
Karen gets caught in a downward spiral and Dr. Stan worries about her; Vanessa and Bethany are encouraged to be ``bad girls'' for a day; Tess is challenged to be a better listener.

4-8
Iyanla challenges Allison; a visitor raises uncomfortable questions for Vanessa; one of the women learns she is graduating, while another is told she is not doing the work that is required of her.

4-11
Dr. Stan and the life coaches explore the topic of body image and the role that it plays in the self-esteem of some women.

April 1, 2005 Spoiler

Here's the spoiler for April 1, 2005. You'll love this great episode!

Robert leaves the next morning. He doesn’t want to but he has to get back. So he will not be there for her graduation.

The gastro doctor calls Bethany and says that her blood work shows low iron and that could be caused by an ulcer. He wants to do the endoscopy thing. Bethany is then talking to Rhonda and says that she is excited to have it done and maybe get some real answers.
All she asks is that Rhonda be right there when she wakes up because the medicine they give makes you have a slight amnesia feel and she is terrified of waking up and not knowing anyone. Otherwise she is ready to go.

Allison is meeting with Iyanla and they have those ugly wig heads there. Iyanla calls them her squatters. Iyanla says that Allison’s most prominent squatter is being worthless. Iyanla asks Allison why did she go through 21 weeks of chemo and 6 weeks of radiation if she thinks she is not worthy of living?

Bethany and Rhonda are at the day surgery and Bethany is excited about having the procedure. Her only concern is that she see Rhonda’s face when she wakes up.

Back to Allison. Iyanla asks her again why did she fight to live and Allison says that she thinks that she did it so that her family wouldn’t have to go through her dying. Iyanla tells Allison that her life is in danger but not from the cancer but from the squatters. She wants her to work on her body image so she is meeting with Marcus today. But she has to take her squatters with her.

Group is led by Iyanla of course since Rhonda and Bethany are at the doctors. Candy is called up to the love seat. Candy has on a new blouse and skirt and Iyanla makes a big deal about her. We see the old self portrait and the new self portrait. Iyanla asks her what her definition of femininity is and Candy says it is to accept yourself for who you really are and let your inner beauty shine through. Iyanla says that since Candy seems to have had a bunch of make-overs already that today Vanessa and Tess are taking her shopping for a fabulous dress and then Rachel and Allison will do her make up. Candy is going to also go get a massage.

We go back to the doctor’s and we see the camera going down Bethany’s throat. Just a little gaggy, not bad and not very long. Then he comes in to recovery room and shows her the pictures he took and tells her that he took several biopsies. He says that he saw a lot of irritation in her stomach and some blood spots. He says that he wants to wait for the biopsy results and that will be in a couple days.

Marcus Alert!!!! Allison works with Marcus a little with her squatters in tow. He says that he is impressed with how well she did.

Vanessa, Tess and Candy go shopping. We see her try on a few dresses and they all agree on this lacy one. It is very nice.

Allison meets with Dr Stan and she has her squatters with her. He says that he wants to ask about the one labeled fat and ugly. He asks her how long she has felt that way and she said since she was a kid.

Candy is getting her massage.

Back to Allison and Dr. Stan. She tells Dr. Stan that her dad was an abusive alcoholic. He was verbally abusive to Allison and she believes he was probably physically abusive to her mom. She said her mom was unable to show her the love she needed. Dr. Stan says that she has got to learn to love her self.

Bethany is back and a little woozy. Rachel helps her down to her room and Bethany shows her the pictures that the doctor took in her stomach. Bethany says that this doctor finding some answers has made her so happy and she is no longer afraid to go to the doctor.

Candy is sitting in a chair and Allison is doing her make up and Rachel is doing her hair.

It is time for Candy’s graduation. She looks wonderful. We see the clips of her stay in the house. Iyanla tells her that it has been an honor to serve her and that she is always just a phone call away. Rhonda says a blip about Candy being ready to graduate. Vanessa tells her that she remembers having a difficult session and that Candy hugged her and just let her cry on her shoulder. She said thanks for her being her friend unconditionally.

Rachel says that they shared a trait that they had both abandoned part of themselves. She tells Candy that she is like a mother to her and she doesn’t tell many people that.
Candy’s gifts are $200 worth of products to pamper herself with. A $200 gift certificate to the hair salon and a $3000 gift certificate from Lowe’s to get work done on her house. Her statue says, “Katrinda, a real woman”
Candy says that the house saved her life. She tells them that she will be there for them all always. We see more clips. When Candy is getting in the limo to leave she says that they have a wedding to come to. (that must be the Las Vegas one!) Iyanla made a wedding comment earlier in the show too.
The show ends with the obligatory shot of the roomie (Vanessa) left behind saying that she hopes her new roommate is as great as Candy.

Previews-
The new hg shows up. Karen shares her painful and shocking story. Iyanla says, “you were willing to give up that part of your life in order to be safe?”
Then voice over says, “Her arrival hits a raw nerve in the house”. Vanessa in group says, “I just have to say something because its just really making me angry.”

A biker comes to the house to deliver a message to Bethany and Vanessa that they are going to be bad girls for the day. Vanessa says that she hopes she doesn’t have to ride a motorcycle because she is afraid of them.

Tension mounts in the house. Tess, Allison and Rachel are sitting at the dining room table and Allison says, “We just need to nip this in the bud, you (meaning Rachel) said something to Tess that was kind of rude.” Tess in confessional saying, “She just shut me down!”

Rachel meets her dad for the first time. Rachel is on the phone saying, “aaaahhhhh!!!! He’s probably waking in right now! I don’t know what to say.” She just drops the phone on the chair and takes off. She does have a big smile on her face. We see Iyanla outside the house as the limo drives up and then we see her walking him in. We just see him for a second from the back. But you can tell he is smiling and so is Iyanla.

March 31, 2005 Spoiler

Thanks to the contributer of this spoiler:

Rachel is carrying around a calculator and saying to look at how much her aunt spent of her money to send her away to school in Montana. It’s not til she shows it to Candy that Candy yells, “oh my God!”

Tess is meeting with Rhonda. Rhonda says that Tess doesn’t really even know what love is. She tells Tess that she is to call her mother, father, sister and husband and ask how she gives them love. And if she feels courageous enough she can ask some of her housemates.

Candy is meeting with Iyanla and they say that Robert is coming to the house today. Iyanla asks her what she wants to communicate to him when he visits. Candy, says “that I’m okay.” And she is crying and Iyanla asks why she is crying and Candysays that she didn’t think she would ever be able to say that to him. Iyanla says that Candy has thought tht her long hair is the one thing that was feminine for her and asks her if she is ready to cut it. I guess she is going to get it cut before Robert comes. Iyanla is laughing and saying that she is excited. Candy looks like a deer in headlights.

Iyanla leads group. She tells the women to take deep breaths and find their centers Tess starts crying in group and Iyanla is looking at her and Tess just keeps crying and Iyanla says, “if I stare at you, do you think you can tell me why you are crying or do I need to ask?” Tess says that she realizes that her problems are not just with her husband. That she realizes she has issues with her mother and other women.” In confessional Iyanla says that she is not feeling Tess’ energy and thinks that this is not a true breakthrough but Tess wanting attention. Allison says that she is jealous of Tess’ breakthrough. Iyanla asks her what else she is jealous of and Allison says that she is jealous of the good health of the otheres and some other stuff. Iyanla talks about how toxic jealousy. The others add their own jealousy. Tess chimes in that she is her own toxin and Iyanla stops her and starts sniffing the air and says that she smells a lie. Tess says that she doesn’t feel she is lying. They point out that her saying she hasn’t lost her “baby weight” is a toxin and her marriage is a toxin. Iyanla says that you have to speak your mind to rid yourself of the toxins and wants the women to make it a detoxing day.

Rhonda takes Bethany for another walk to discuss where she is in her steps. Rhonda says that Bethany is not getting over her walls. Rhonda asks her about how she used to love to sing in front of others and now she can’t. Bethany says it is because she is afraid she will hyperventilate and can’t do it. Rhonda says that is an example of Bethany running into these brick walls. Nothing has changed in her singing ability but Bethany wants it to be nothing less than perfect, so she just sets up a wall and doesn’t do it at all. Rhonda tells her that she can hope and dream all she wants but if she puts up the walls she will do nothing. So they are at a fake brick wall and Rhonda is telling her to name her brick walls and having her use a spray can of paint to write what is stopping her. She writes too fat, not good enough, Jessica is better, ugly, hopeless and bunches of others.

Rachel is on the phone with her friend Jamal about what is going on with he Aunt Ellen. He is telling her not to let Ellen be the end of the world to her. She should not let her aunt disrespect her just so she will love her.

Robert shows up at the house. Vanessa takes Robert to the guest room and tells him that she isn’t sure how long Candy is out for. Then we see Candy at the salon. Allison is with her.

Iyanla comes to the house and sits down to talk to Robert. She asks if he has noticed changes in her and he says that she is very happy to be there and that she is doing things she never would have done before. Iyanla tells Robert about Candy telling her the story of a time when she and Robert went dancing and he had told her to let him lead. Iyanla says that while Candy is out she is having a dance instructor come in to give him a dance lesson. Iyanla says that they are sending them out to dinner and she asks him that when they return to the house would he ask her to dance with him and see if she lets him lead.

Tess calls her husband and says that she wants to ask him how she gives him love. He says with affection but then he says that sometimes what she says and what she does is two different things. He mentions something about the evil side to her. Then she asks how she withholds love. He says by lying and hanging out all night and disrespecting. She asks if there is anything else and he said there probably is but he needs to think about it. She says that she knows he is driving right now and doesn’t want him to have a wreck so they will talk more later.

The dance instructor comes and starts to teach Robert.
Candy tells the woman who is going to cut her hair that she would like it lighter but not real blond and she is trusting her to cut her hair the way she thinks is best. Candy is nervous.

Back to Rhonda and Bethany. Rhonda says that none of this is new and every time they talk about it, Bethany says she is ready to change but she doesn’t make the change. Rhonda has her tear down the wall and asks her if she is really ready. Bethany starts to cry.

Rachel meets with Iyanla. Rachel says that she is so angry that she is just about ready to explode. Iyanla says in confessional that these toxins are very tough for Rachel because they are family members but she can set some very clear boundaries. Iyanla says to Rachel that they will start by talking about Aunt Ellen. (dang it, I don’t think we will see the confrontation today either!)
Iyanla says that she has heard that Rachel say to her that she wants to sue her aunt and to have her removed from the trust. Rachel says that she is open to keeping her on the trust fund if Ellen answers some questions. Iyanla says that she knows that Rachel is angry about the $175,000 (yep that much!) that was spent to send her to that school. Iyanla has Rachel label plates with her anger issues.

Tess calls her mom and asks her how she gives her love. Her mom says that that is hard to answer. She says that Tess will tell her she loves her but that she is not real physical, she isn’t a hugger. Tess asks how she withholds her love and she says that she ignores her and won’t call her.

Rachel is breaking plates. She is angry that Ellen sent her to live with a black family that didn’t even want her. That Ellen didn’t follow her mother’s wishes. That when Rachel visited she was made to feel unwelcome and mad to sleep on the couch. When she asked her aunt why she didn’t let her live with her she said it was because she was an incorrigible brat. Iyanla lays on the grass with her and asks her what she wants to do and Rachel says she wants to call her. Iyanla says in confessional that Aunt Ellen has no idea that that frightened 12 year old is gone and there is a self assured young woman standing up for herself confronting her.

Tess calls her sister Torrei and asks her how she shows her love and she answers that she has no idea. Tess asks how she withholds love and Torrei says she was always afraid to tell her she loved her because Tess would tell her to shut up.

Candy comes home and her hair is just a little past her shoulders and parted on the sid and straight. Robert has a big smile on his face and he has a rose for her. They leave in a stretch limo and go to dinner. Robert tells her at dinner that he is so glad she came to the house. When they get back to the house Robert tells Candy that he has a surprise for her and he takes her in the house and tells her that he had a dance lesson and they dance by fire light. She is so happy and says that she is never going back to the way she was. Iyanla says in confessional that she asked Robert to deliver one more surprise for her and that he is to tell Candy that she is graduating the next day!

Rachel calls Aunt Ellen and says that she has a couple questions for her and Ellen says that she will not answer any questions for her and Rachel is doing that nervous laugh and says okay then can she send them to her in writing and Ellen says no that she will not participate in anything. Rachel is so in shock that she is still doing that little laugh and asking her, “you won’t answer any questions, even in a letter?” and Ellen says no and hangs up. Rachel is laughing saying this is bad and dialing the phone. (I assume she is calling Iyanla but that is the end.)

Preview- Candy graduates! She says that the house saved her life.

Allison is with Iyanla and Iyanla asks her why did she fight for her life, why didn’t she just die?

Bethany faces another health crisis. She is telling Rhonda that she doesn’t like that feeling, she just freaks out.

Wednesday Spoiler

The show starts with “Zack” from Passions dropping off uniforms and challenging the women to a game of softball. Bethany says that she has taped Passions everyday for four years. They split the teams with half the women and half the men playing together on a team. Cassie embarrasses herself by running the wrong way!! She says in voice over that this proves that she needs the SO house. Bethany seems to be a very good player. At the end of the game Bethany tells the guys that she has never been kissed in her entire life. In confessional she says she looked at those guys and figured she would just go for it! (woo hoo Bethany. I say let’s get that whole virgin thing out of the way while you’re at it! Just kidding!!!!!) One of the guys says that she is in luck because they happen to have a professional, which I think was “Zack”, but I might be wrong. They take a picture with one guy on each side of her, kissing her on the cheeks!!! (booooo! Personally I don’t think on the cheek counts!)

Rhonda is leading group and they all give Bethany a hard time about being kissed. She actually earns a step today. They all have their shirts autographed.

The subject today is the difference between fantasy and reality. Rhonda asks if they have a fantasy do they ever think that it is actually possible. Vanessa says her fantasy if the husband, two kids, a dog and a house. Rhonda asks Bethany if today’s kiss was fantasy or reality. Bethany giggles and says it was definitely a reality. Rhonda says that if the kiss was just a fantasy thing that Bethany would never have had the guts to ask for it. Fantasy keeps you from making your desires a reality.
At the end of group, Rachel asks if Iyanla is coming today and Rhonda says no and then makes her come sit in the love seat. Rachel is laughing. Rhonda asks Rachel why she needs Iyanla and Rachel says that today is a big day for her because she is mailing her album today. Rhonda says to tell them what is going on and Rachel says the others already know and she fills Rhonda in and Rhonda calls for a group hug. Cassie rides with Rachel to go mail her album. Rachel tells Cassie that she really appreciates her support. In confessional Rachel says that she feels closest to Cassie because of their similar stories.

Bethany meets with Rhonda. Rhonda asks Bethany how it felt to ask for the kiss and Bethany said she couldn’t imagine letting the opportunity pass. Rhonda says that her next assignment is to rid herself of her charade. She tells Bethany to go get Renee. Rhonda says that Bethany is going to have a kissing booth and that Renee is running the booth. They are going to raise money for charity. Bethany asks if Renee can go first and Rhonda says that Renee is not doing any kissing. Bethany is the kissee. Bethany goes from laughing to crying and Rhonda asks her what is going on and Bethany says that not one man will pay to kiss her. She says that she doesn’t understand why Rhonda would want to put that fat girl behind the table to sell kisses. Rhonda basically tells her that she is wrong and asks her if she will do the assignment. Rhonda asks her what she thinks she is thinking. Rhonda tells her that she never thought she was putting a fat girl there. She tells Bethany that she wants her to put the “fantasy” behind her. Rhonda says that she knows this is scary and a real risk for her but she has faith in her. Bethany tells her that she trusts her and she will do the assignment.

Rhonda is now with Vanessa. She has a podium set up. She puts a bronze medal on her and asks her what the bronze means and Vanessa says it means you did a bad job. Rhonda puts a silver on her. Vanessa says that in a way it is worse because you were so close but still failed. Rhonda puts the gold on her and Vanessa says it means attention for her. She says that by not winning, it is like she had wasted her life. Vanessa says that she feels bad for letting down the people who had supported her. Rhonda asks what she wished that they had said to her. Vanessa said she wishes that they had told her it was okay and that they had noticed how upset she was. Vanessa says that she wants to tell them she is sorry for giving up.

Rachel, Renee and Bethany leave to go set up her kissing booth. Bethany says in confessional that she just can’t figure out what Rhonda thinks she is going to learn from this.

Rhonda takes Cassie up to the loft. She tells Cassie that the birth father called and said
That because of his broken relationship with his ex-wife and son that he does not feel comfortable meeting with Cassie but that he is giving her the phone number of his 2nd ex-wife who raised Dustin from the ages of 2 til 10. Her name is Shelly.

Vanessa calls her mom and her mom, Nanette, asks her how it is going and Vanessa tells her that even if she left the house today that they would see a different person. She tells her mom that she realized that she was blaming others and she already feels like a big weight has been lifted off.

Cassie and Rhonda call Shelly who raised Dustin from age 2 to 10. She agrees to come to the Starting Over house and she says that she will bring pictures and stories. It appears that the adoptive father has already kind of clued her in because she said that they have already been putting some pictures together and also she doesn’t seem to be thrown but his call. Cassie is very happy.

Renee, Rachel and Cassie start setting up the table and Bethany has her first taker before they even get things set up. Rachel tells a guy that Bethany has never been kissed and he says he wants to be first. He pays her a dollar and puts his arms around and tells her to loosen up and gives her a peck on the lips. Then we lots clips of lots of guys kissing all three of them. They get back to the house and Bethany is telling Candy and Vanessa about it. She had a lot of fun and they raised $32.80. Candy says to tell her about the 80 cents and Bethany says that a homeless guy gave it to her, she thinks he felt sorry for her.
Bethany only had to raise $20. Then Bethany calls Rhonda and tells her and Rhonda asks her if she had fun and was it an adventure and Bethany says yes. Rhonda asks what Bethany learned from this and Bethany says that she realizes that she needs to loosen up and just have fun.

Cassie is getting ready for bed and in confessional she says that what has kept her strong is that she has never forgotten when she looked into her sons eyes when he was born.

Preview- Renee is meeting with Iyanla and her mom and she is confronting her about the time she was molested.

Vanessa is meeting with Dr. Stan and talking about her world crashing when she lost at the trials.

Friday the 18th Spoiler

Here's the Friday the 18th spoiler. It will prove to be a special day for Denise:

Denise gets a note delivered to her by three young women. The note says to meet her Rhonda at Shirley’s at 11am. They do a cheer and leave. (another rumor blown out of proportion, cause that was it with the cheerleaders.)

Denise says that graduating is bittersweet.

Friday January 21st Spoiler

Candy is trying to kid around with Denise. They are in the walk in closet and she has her drawer open and she starts messing up the clothes that are in it and laughing telling Denise that she can be messy. Denise just walks out, totally absorbed in herself. Candy in confessional saying that Denise is very self absorbed.

Cassie meets with Jeri the mediator again. She reads the letter she wrote to the adoptive mother. Jeri tells her that she needs to change it so that it is more about what the son’t needs are and not Cassie’s. She tells Cassie that no matter what she writes that most likely the mother will view it as a letter from the “enemy”. Rhonda shows up and Cassie tells her what is going on and Rhonda tells Cassie that she has a six o’clock appointment with a private eye.

Group is lead by Iyanla today. Today she asks them, “what is a friend?” Most of them answer that it is someone you can rely on to always be there. Iyanla asks the women if they are friends with the other hg’s. Denise says yes in group but in confessional she says that she thinks she choose your friends and she didn’t choose who came to the house. Then Iyanla asks if the trust each other. Cassie, Bethany, and Candy all say yes. Renee and Denise say no. Rachel says selectively.

Iyanla asks them which woman they have the most trouble with. Candy says Denise and Denise says she feels that Candy tries to control her. Candy tells the story about Denise wanting to fix hamburger for herself and Candy was trying to help her and Denise didn’t want the help.
Iyanla asks Renee who she doesn’t trust and she says it is Rachel. Renee says she fells like she has tried to become friends and Rachel hasn’t. Renee starts crying and Rachel just looks annoyed. Iyanla leads the conversation between them by Renee saying something and then Iyanla asks Rachel what she heard Renee say. And it turns out that Rachel was filtering what Renee was saying, big time! Iyanla asks for the groups input and Denise says that she thinks Renee feels left out.
Iyanla tells Denise and Candy that they are going out to dinner together on her and she tells Renee and Rachel to try and find something to do together and talk.

Cassie calls her aunt. Her aunt asks her if she really think pushing herself into her son’s life is the right thing to do and Cassie says yes. Her aunt asks her if she is doing it for her self or for him. Her aunt tells her that she thinks that Cassie should not look him up and that she will continue to pray for Cassie. She tells Cassie to forgive herself for the past and that she loves her. (this sounds kind of mean on paper, but her aunt was very kind in expressing her opinion and Cassie took it well. They seem to be very close)

Rachel and Denise are sitting on one of the beds talking. They are becoming very close. They hug and tell each other they trust each other.

Bethany meets with Rhonda. Rhonda says in voice over that Bethany is afraid of being rejected by her old friends. Rhonda puts a picture up on the plasma of Bethany and her two friends, Ashley and Elizabeth. They talk about how Bethany has pushed them away. Bethany says she got a letter that day from (I think) Elizabeth and that she was telling Bethany she missed her and hoped she was doing well. Bethany says she pushes them away because she doesn’t want to hurt them. Rhonda asks her if that means she plans on going through the rest of her life alone? Bethany says no. She says that she thinks she misses them in her heart. Rhonda tells Bethany to call them and ask them how her amnesia affected them and to tell one story of something secret between them that she hasn’t been told before now.

Rachel meets with Iyanla. Iyanla tells Rachel that she heard her “dismiss” Renee in group. Rachel says that maybe she feels like she is better than her. Iyanla asks why and Rachel says she things Renee is materialist and self absorbed. She doesn’t think Renee gives a damn about her story. Rachel says that she has a hard time with people who don’t get along with their parents.

Now we join Denise and Candy as they are getting ready to leave. Denise has picked where to go to eat and then asks Candy if she minds if she drives. Candy doesn’t care.

Iyanla gives Rachel another accordion file and this one is for her step dad.

Cassie meets with Richard the private investigator. He takes down her info and says that they will get back to her in a couple days.

Bethany calls her friend, Josh and him what it was like for him when she lost her memory. He said it was weird but that he didn’t mind reintroducing himself into her life. He said that they are actually better friends now that before the accident.

Back to Denise and Candy. It is pouring down rain and Denise is being overly bubbly and loud about going out. Candy is now basically ignoring her. In confessional Denise is saying that she really doesn’t want to go. They leave and they go to a nice Italian restaurant and they order a bottle of wine.

Bethany calls her friend, Ashley. Ashley tells Bethany that she is a more accepting person now then she was before the memory loss.

Denise tells Candy that when she said in group she did not trust everyone in the house, she was referring to Renee, not her.

Bethany calls her friend Elizabeth. One thing Elizabeth tells her is that it is so weird that before her memory loss, Bethany hated country music and now she loves it.

Candy and Denise are really talking. Denise asks Candy what her siblings think of her being on SO. Candy says that she is only close to her 3 younger sisters. Candy tells Denise that 3 of her brothers are in jail. Denise’s mouth drops open.

Renee is hanging out with Rachel while Rachel is decorating the shells to give away to cancer patients.

Candy is telling Denise about her abusive husband. She tells the story of when her
Son fell and cracked his head open and her husband wouldn’t let her use the car, so she ended up taking her son to the hospital on the bus. Then when her first daughter was born, he walked in and said “well you got the damn girl you wanted” and walked out. Candy says in confessional that she thinks this is the first time Denise has ever really listened to her.

Bethany meets with Rhonda again. She tells Rhonda her conversations with her friends. Rhonda tells her that it is more important to just make new memories than worry about not remembering the old one.

Denise and Candy are back. Denise tells Cassie that she feels that she did connect with Candy at dinner. Denise asks Cassie if Renee and Rachel bonded and Candy shakes her head no.

Rachel, Bethany and Renee are sitting at the dining room table. Rachel asks Renee what she is writing and Renee doesn’t answer her, so Rachel gets up and leaves.

Dec 20th Episode Summary

Here's a summary of the Dec 20th episode that someone saw this week:

Towanda went and got her hair done for for her performance. It's long shoulder length hair with bangs, she meets with her singing coach who is frank about her really feeling the song and not having dead eyes while she sings, Towanda is going to really think about what she says so she'll do well.
Cassie writes a long letter to Rhonda about how she's in the house to learn to speak up and be heard and no one is hearing her about her hair and she hates it- she signs it just "Cassie" and shows it to Sommer and Renee and stresses that she didn't sign it "thanks, Cassie", the women agree if that's how she feels then she should share it with Rhonda.
Iyanla holds group and has gives the women each a peacock feather. She tells them each to look at the eye of the feather and balance the long feather on their finger while focusing on the eye thinking of themselves and they're issues and how they can overcome/achieve. Renee can't balance it at all and she gets a bit annoyed that she isn't able to do it. Towanda is balancing it the best. Cassie is balancing it well and is even spinning circles to make sure it doesn't fall. Iyanla is explaining that you have to move with the obstacles and go with the flow to keep focus on the task at hand.
Renee and Iyala meet. They are talking about bad things that have happened to here that have brought her to where she is today. There is a posterboard. Renee writes "Daddy took $" then some other mildly significantly things like someone stole her identity to buy a cellphone and pizza once. Then Iyanla prods her quite a bit. Renee pauses, and say "something happened when I was little but...." Iyanla very talentedly I might add keeps it going so Renee can't stop to think. Renee goes on to say it was a secret and it happened when she was 7 or 8. And she told her mom when she was older and her mom didn't believe her. Renee is starting to cry. Iyanla says if it's too hard for her to do it in 3rd person. Iyanla asks what happened to her. Renee goes on to tell her that a friend of her family a man that was babysitting her and a friend molested them. He told them not to tell, and made it seem ok at the time. She felt dirty and never told her dad. And hasn't talked about it in a long long time. She's crying. Iyanla hug her and says it happend to her to when she was 9 by a man she knew to. Renee says that the molester committed suicide a few years back and it was the best day of her life. Iyanla just holds her and tells her they are finally ready to move forward for her. She gives her a stone and tells her that night to drop it into the pool and watch the rings it creates, because those are the rings of the people that know what this feels like and that she's not alone. She tells her to take it easy tonight and be gentle to herself.
Rhonda and Cassie meet. Cassie reads her the letter. Rhonda is pleased that Cassie is so upset about something. She explains that for the first time she is meeting the real Cassie. Rhonda comes back later wearing a dark brown wig with bangs, Rhonda asks if she is any different of a person for the hair change. Cassie says she gets it and appologizes. Then at the end asks for extra highlights saying after all she's a women... Rhonda says you're obviously are not getting it IT'S NOT ABOUT THE HAIR it's about the feelings the hair brings up???!!!
Renee is a raw nerve and kind of picks a little fight with Rachel about Rachel not cleaning up a mess she's made in the kitchen. Rachel gets in her face and says "I'm right here and I'm getting to it" and acts kinda bullyish and teenagerish IMO.
Denise,Cassie and Rachel go to Target. Denise says that she is sick of Sommer. They start talking about Sommer talking to the production people and how it is interfering with things. Denise is suprised and doesn't seem to see any of this going on. Rachel starts dogging on Renee and says that whatever Sommer does Renee does and how Renee is there for the wrong reasons. The carload seems to agree that Renee doesn't belong in the house. Meanwhile Sommer is at the house telling Renee that she thinks Rachel is a big phoney and she doesn't think any of the tears are real.
Everyone is back at the house. Renee sits at the table by Cassie and Renee starts to talk to her sadly but on edge about "I heard that you all talked about how I don't belong in the house..." (not sure how she found out BTW...) Rachel overhears and starts saying something and says intimidatinly "do you want me to be part of this conversation?" Renee snidly says "I'm talking to Cassie!" Rachel goes down to the computer where she can hear everything. Renee starts reading from her journal to Cassie about her feeling and is basically talking about Rachel, Cassie is obviously in the middle, and Cassie says "I've never really had a real emotional converstion with you Renee" and Renee says loudly (the tention is high Denise is on the phone holding it up for whomever to listen...) "then don't let Rachel decide for you if I belong in the house make up your mind yourself don't let her decide for you!" Rachel jumps up throws her arms up and starts yelling at Renee and is coming closer to her and yells "You're just here to drink and meet boys that's it" Then it shows Denise holding the phone up toward the argument (we don't know who is on the phone) she's on her knees cleaning up a wine glass that has broken next to the table by the phone.

Monday Spoiler

Remember the rumor that some of the houseguests got into the production office? Here's what supposedly happened according to an insider:

The notes read in the production office pertained to a certain houseguest who just had a makeover. SO took it upon themselves to find a certain person from her past and set up a meeting. In the comming days information starts to get leaked to her by another housemate. Rhonda finds out and even though they knew who the girls, yes girls who were in the office giggling, they wanted them to sweat it out and create a little drama knowing viewers would keep watching. Two housemates get reprimanded, though only one gets the boot. more to come...

Sommer is the house guest that gets the boot.

Daily Summaries for next week on Starting Over

Here are summaries for next week's episodes:

Daily Summaries from Zap2it.com Mon. Dec. 6 to Fri. Dec. 10

Armed policemen evacuate the women from the house; Denise faces a harsh realization about
herself; Iyanla forces Towanda into isolation; Cassie deals with the possibility that her son might
not want to talk to her.

Towanda experiences painful revelations about her family and herself; Sommer prepares for a visit
from her parents; Denise tries to get attention from her roommates.

Towanda feels Iyanla betrayed her; Rachael talks about her emotional scars; Renee breaks down
when she receives an assignment she thinks she cannot handle.

Sommer's parents arrive; Cassie meets with an adoption attorney to discuss her desire to
reconnect with her son; Towanda invites her husband to the house.

Towanda's husband visits; Sommer has a breakthrough with her parents; Rachael experiences
grief over her deceased mother.

Daily Summaries from all other listings I could find for Mon. Dec. 13 & Tues. Dec. 14

Sommer's parents arrive at the house; Cassie is dealt an emotional blow after meeting with an
adoption attorney; Towanda invites her husband to the house.

Towanda and her husband engage in a fierce conversation; Sommer has a breakthrough with her
parents; Rachael deals with the grief over her deceased mother.

Monday Dec 6th Spoiler

The show starts with hot surfer guy, Sean, coming to the house to pick up Sommer. He's going to teach Sommer and a friend how to surf. Sommer asks Denise to join her. Denise is excited, but Sommer is scared, it's a big risk. At the beach they put on wet suits and Sommer is happier, it's better than being at the pool in her bathing suit. Sean (ooooh, yummy) leads them in some stretches, then gets them in the water.

Dr Stan arrives to meet with Rachael. She talks about her brother, Jason, who is 31 and lives on the east coast. She says he blew all their parents money, and left two days after the funeral. She feels like he abandoned her. Rachael had counselling after her parents died, but she didn't talk about it, she was in denial. She's afraid to grieve since she's afraid she won't be able to pick up the pieces. She contemplated suicide since she wanted to be with her parents.

Back to the surfing. Sommer is trying hard and seems to be having fun. She's doing better than I did my first time, surfing is hard!

Back to Rachael and Dr Stan. She tried to comfort herself by sneaking out at night and meeting boys, so people didn't see her as hurt. She doesn't understand why they didn't see through that. She repeats that her aunt didn't have the "tools" to look after her, Dr Stan thinks maybe her aunt just didn't want to. Rachael is still in contact with her aunt, but has never confronted her about this. She has never been assertive with her brother either, she's afraid it would push them away.

Sommer and Denise get back, and Denise says in confessional that she did better than Sommer. (as far as I could tell, she wasn't) She also says this to Cassie, who sort of reprimands her, saying it was Sommer's assignment. Denise says she can't help being better.

Rhonda leads group, and Sommer tells her about surfing. They discuss the first trip to the beach when Sommer wouldn't even get in the water. Rhonda introduces the "stretch, risk or die" excercise. A stretch is "something kinda scary, but not too scary, so you'll do it" a risk is "something way scary, you're going to do it, but you're nervous about it" and die is "absolutely not, you don't want to do it because you're going to die".

Rhonda asks Sommer what her die zone is, and Sommer says she thinks she's been there a lot lately, and comments that she seems to gain more confidence with every risk she takes. Rhonda announces that tonight there will be a "I lost 100lbs" celebration. Sommer doesn't like the party idea. She understands it will allow her to own the 100lbs, but she just wants them gone.

Rhonda asks Renee what her die zone is, and she says seeing her father again. They haven't spoken for 9-10 years. She admits it wouldn't be okay for him to be happy and proud of her, she wants him to have suffered without her in his life.

Rachael's die zone is admitting to her brother and aunt how abandoned she felt, and how angry she is about it. She's scared they will push her away and then she'll really be alone. Rhonda praises her for being able to admit her anger.

Iyanla and Renee meet. Iyanla talks about choices, and says that thinking could be hazardous to Renee's healing. She tells Renee to get her six-year-old. Renee's father was the authority figure, her mom she was very close to, her brother was nasty and mean. She says she inherited her father's bad temper. Iyanla senses some deep pain in Renee that she's not ready to discuss, so Iyanla assigns her to do some role-plays. Renee starts out as herself at 6, Cassie is her mom, Denise is her dad, and Rachael is her brother. They really get into it, and Denise says in confessional that it was really easy for her to be mean and angry, like her own dad.

Towanda and Sommer go shopping for party supplies, and Sommer just keeps saying she doesn't want to make a big deal out of it, she not into the idea of a party at all.

Dr Stan meets with Renee. (BTW, she's 28) She knows she has anger issues, she thinks it's because she didn't have a father "growing up", then she corrects herself and says "after high school". Dr Stan says she didn't have a father for her transition to adulthood, so she feels stuck in adolescence(sp?). She had a great boyfriend for a long time, he treated her like a baby, she had him wrapped around her finger, but she broke up with him because she got tired of it. Dr Stan points out that she saw him as a father figure. Renee cries about being stuck as a teenager and not "getting it" in the house. Dr Stan tells her he and Iyanla don't expect her to get it yet.

Towanda is having fun shopping, and says in confessional she's on a mission to make sure Sommer has a good time, even though she gets in a "mood" sometimes when she isn't feeling it. Sommer just keeps saying she doesn't want a party.

Rachael and Iyanla meet, and Iyanla asks her what it was like role playing the brother. Rachael says it was uncomfortable and hilarious. Iyanla comments that maybe Rachael's brother had to back off, in order to deal with their parents death, and wasn't able to be there for her, maybe he knows she's angry with him about it. Rachael agrees that could be the case.

Renee does another role play, as a teenager this time. She was a real party girl, and didn't care about school. She says in confessional that this role play is bringing back the memories, and it's hitting her hard.

While driving home, Sommer decides she needs to take a risk, and at a stop light she jumps out of the car, runs all around it, then jumps back in, laughing. In confessional she says taking a risk is like a rush of adrenaline.

Renee talks to Iyanla about what she has learned today. She's aware she disrespects her co-workers, and she manipulates boyfriends. Her father made an attempt to reconcile, but Renee didn't want to.

It's time for Sommer's party. In confessional, Rhonda says that Sommer told her that she gains an insight with every pound lost, so Rhonda wants her to come up with 100 insights. The HGs order pizza and sit outside with party hats on. Sommer reads her insights and they light a candle for each one. One "insight" is that Sommer has quit smoking!

Rachael calls her aunt and says there are still things between them they need to talk about. Her aunt doesn't have anything, but says if Rachael does, that's okay. Rachael says she felt abandoned, and everyone at the house wonders why she wasn't taken in by family. Her aunt says she's not going to feel guilty about it, she's just Rachael's aunt, not her mother. She says that there wasn't anyone who could cope with Rachael except in a theraputic environment. She says taking Rachael in would have disrupted her whole family. She says she's not trying to hurt Rachael, or be mean, that's just the reality. She points out that Rachael's mom didn't want to die, she tried all kinds of treatments, and as her sister, Rachael's aunt was grieving too. She has to go, but tells Rachael to call whenever she needs to talk.

Previews for Tuesday:

The women have a terrifying night: We see group with Rhonda and Iyanla, and Towanda says "The alarm went off and it sounded like someone entering the house."

And what the scare reveals could spell disaster for one woman:
(okay, I'm going to describe this bit fully, and you can draw your own conclusions)
First shot: Rhonda has her head turned to the right and says "This is grounds for dismissal."
Second shot: We see Towanda, Denise and Rachael sitting on the couch to Rhonda and Iyanla's left. We hear Rhonda saying "You should not be in the Starting Over house.." and Rachael is nodding.
Third shot: We see the whole group, Sommer, Renee and Cassie are sitting on the couch to Rhonda's left. Sommer is closest to Rhonda, and Renee is in the middle. I can't see the expressions on their faces. Rhonda seems to be looking out at the group as a whole and continues "...because you're not here for the right reasons."

Denise makes a heart-wrenching connection: We see her talking to Towanda, saying "It makes sense, why I hold onto anger."

And Towanda explodes: We see her sobbing, and Iyanla holding her, then Iyanla encouraging her, saying "You can do this."

So Tuesday's the big day, I think it's Sommer Rhonda was talking to, but who knows? The editing leaves it very unclear.

Nov 18th Spoiler

Here's the spoiler for Thurday's show (11/18):

Josie is putting on make up and saying that she is nervous about going home tomorrow. Amy is here bearing cupcakes and presents for Josie and Chloe. They show flashbacks of Josie and Amy. Then Hailey and Lynell show up. Josie says that they will always be in her and Chloe’s life. (oh goody, there’s a good influence. Please read sarcastically). Susan shows up and she looks good, then in comes Rain! It is just a big ole reunion. Josie says she in confessional that she is really frightened about leaving. Rhonda calls all of SO house #1 together. Rhonda wants them to share what they have done since leaving to reassure Josie. Lynell says she is crocheting 24/7 and says that the L chain is supporting her financially. Susan in next. She says her father and her and corresponding regularly with letters and phone calls. Susan is dating, but no one special. Rhonda gives Susan a hard time about having an open heart.

Iyanla meets with the sisterhood. She asks is they are ready for Denver and Kim says she thinks she wrote a great letter and she told her sister that this visit was not about her it was about Kim and that this was an opportunity for them to start fresh. Kim says she cannot get ahold of her sister. Iyanla is suspicious. Iyanla says that she wants Kim to talk to Kelly by the end of the day.
Jennifer asks what she is supposed to do if her dad doesn’t respond. Iyanla says that that is okay and not to let it make her stop loving him, but to realize that is his choice.
Back to Rhonda and SO #1 hg’s. Amy tells about her travel service on line and that she is leaving for Europe soon. Now to Hailey. She got her soccer coaching license and she quit smoking. Rain moved back to Indiana to live with her mom. She is driving a school bus. She decided to go back because she was $1000 behind on her car note. Rain says she is writing a book.(hmmm, I am not seeing a big success story here) Now it is Josie’s turn to update. And then they all get to tell her what they see changed in her.

Back to sisterhood. Towanda is saying that she hasn’t seen him in two years. But she has spoke to him sporadically. She has been writing him and lately she has emailed him to get his phone number and she said he emailed her yesterday and said he does NOT want to talk to Towanda. He said for her not to call him. (poor T, how sad) Iyanla asked her how this felt. (boy this is not going to be helpful to Jennifer’s jitters is it? How can a parent turn on a child? My brother treated my mom so badly the last five years of her life, but she never stopped loving him, even though she was so hurt. She said no matter what, he was her son. How sad.) T says that it really hurts. Iyanla hugs her. Iyanla asks if T is feeling that the static on the line is that now she is telling herself that she has now been told that her stepmom means more to her dad than her. Iyanla tells her that she needs to feel this pain and it is okay to feel hate for her. (This is so sad)

Rhonda says that the hg’s are all going to a costume shop and dress old Hollywood style for a special party at the “Derby” I sse lots of boa’s and Josie has on a tiara. Amy says in confessional that she thinks Josie is putting on a brave face but that she believes Josie is so afraid to leave the house’s safety net.

Now to the “scare”. Josie comes home and she brings Chloe out saying that Chloe isn’t breathing good. Now we can’t hear Chloe and she looks just fine in Josie’s arms. Sommer comes over and says that she thinks Chloe sounds bad. T says that Chloe seems like she is delirious and is not able to catch her breath. Josie, T and Lynell get a hot shower going and get Chloe to the steam. It seems to help a little. They decide to call an ambulance. They are standing there and Rain pipes up with, “I have a daughter who has asthma and they can die. Let me hold her.” T takes control and drags Josie away saying that they have to go outside to meet the ambulance. The ambulance comes and takes Josie and Chloe away. The women all form a circle and Cassie leads them in prayer.
Some of them are sitting around talking. Sommer says that she would rather be safe than sorry and Rain says that Chloe needed a doctor’s appointment, not a 911 call. Then Josie calls hysterical from the hospital and asks Sommer to come get her. Turns out Chloe has a virus.
The next morning, Towanda is playing with Chloe. Rhonda comes for group. They fill her in on the night before and Jennifer even mentions that Josie was hysterical. And Rhonda just has this smirk on her face. Sommer chimes in that it was cool though to see all the women support her and Josie says she just doesn’t know what she would have done with out all of them there to help her. And this is the end of that conversation. (hmm, JMO I think this should have been addressed a little more, but oh well. Josie absolutely panicked last night.) They lower the plasma screen and go over how Josie has changed. Josie in confessional saying that last night was a perfect test to see that she is ready to be on her own. She handled it well. (uh what? That girl is in for a rough ride when Chloe starts walking and busts her lip, mouth injuries always bleed a lot) The bump on the show is to text message if you think Josie over reacted. Do ya think? But to be fair, new moms are prone to freak out. And it didn’t help that Sommer and Towanda were feeding her hysteria.
Now we go around the group and they pass Chloe around and say how much they are going to miss her. Rhonda says that since Josie has already had a make over, it is Chloe’s turn. So Cassie is going with Josie to go shop for some outfits for Chloe.
They go to a store called La La Ling. Josie says she wants warm clothes for this winter.
They leave with lots of clothes. Then they show a few Chloe clips to get our tears flowing. Towanda, Sommer and Jennifer are really sad. T says that Chloe was her innocent shoulder to cry on.

Preview-the whole preview is of Josie’s graduation ceremony. Lots of crying.

Wednesday Nov 17th Spoiler

Here's the spoiler for Wednesday, November 17th:

Jennifer calls her mom and says that they have to have a conversation and that she has been putting it off and so she is just going to get it over with. Jennifer tells her mom that she doesn’t think that they have a relationship and she takes the blame for that. She tells her that she was angry with her for years for her mom staying with her dad even though he was dealing drugs, but she knows now that her mom’s marriage is none of her business and she is sorry. Her mom tells her that she accepts her apology.
It is Iyanla’s birthday and Kim and Jennifer give her a card and flowers.
Iyanla meets with Jennifer and Kim together and Jennifer tells her that she called her mom and Kim said she tried to call her sister all weekend and she called her husband and her dad to see if they knew where Kelly was. They didn’t. So Iyanla is taking Kim and Jennifer to Denver to meet with Kelly and Jennifer’s dad. Iyanla gives paper to both and tells them to write letters to tell them that they are coming. Jennifer asks if she really has to go to Denver, since this could all be taken care of over the phone. Iyanla said they are all going. Kim and Jennifer are both freaked out. Kim asks Iyanla how long they are staying and Iyanla says, “until I get a tan!” Kim says, “very funny!” Iyanla also tells Jennifer that she is to write a life plan to give her. Iyanla says this is getting them ready to leave the house. Jennifer’s meeting with her dad will be on the phone anyway when they are in Denver.
Iyanla meets with Towanda. T wrote a letter to her dad. She asked him to forgive her for being judgmental and that she wants a relationship with him. She says it made her sad to hear that he has no pictures of his children in his house. It is like they have been erased from his life. She wants a fresh start. Iyanla gets out the board and says for T to state what she wants from her dad and Iyanla is going to write it down.
Dr. Stan meets with Jennifer. Jennifer says she is ready to graduate. He asks what does she think she hasn’t done to the satisfaction of her coach. She tells him that she has to go to Denver and she is just pretending to be excited about it. She says that she feels that as an adult she should be able to choose what relationships she wants in her life. She feels that a relationship with her dad would just be a negative. Dr. Stan tells her that he feels that sometimes Jennifer is just doing what she is told to do but her heart isn’t in it. And she said that that is true because she doesn’t see the point in some things she is told to do.
Jennifer starts crying and she says that she doesn’t like to think she is the only one trying. She said that if he wanted a relationship, why didn’t he ever answer her letters? Dr. Stan asks her if she realizes that she just wrote her letter and she just shared it with the “wrong” person, she needs to put it on paper and send it to her dad.

Iyanla is meeting with Towanda. Iyanla is happy with T’s letter to her dad and tells her to send it to him.
Dr. Stan meets in group and the subject is confrontation. He wants to see what they think confrontation is and he is wanting to show them that there is healthy confrontations. Kim says for her experience it is never healthy, it is an argument. Towanda agrees that in the past it is negative and now she is seeing that it can be just letting her feeling be known. He announces that there is a BOR tonight. Of course there are the clips from the women on who they think are be called up. Towanda thinks she is going to be called up, Josie says she thinks she is and she feels good about it. Kim says that she doesn’t think it is her or Jennifer because they had been up recently, but you never know.

Jennifer calls her mom and says that they are coming to Denver to see her.

Its BOR time. Jennifer is called up and she is unprepared. What is she doing well? I have 100% effort dealing with my goal. She thinks that after the last BOR she has stepped up to the plate. What does she still need to work on? Her father. She says she feels like she has just given and given and she gets no response. She starts crying. She says that she has poured her heart in to them. Iyanla asks if she has really done that, because what they tend to receive is what they send out. Iyanla asks her what does she still need to work on? Jennifer says that she needs to be honest with her dad. Iyanla says that she needs to see that she needs to be honest with herself and that she can’t do the one without first owning up to herself. Iyanla asks Jennifer if she was to grade herself today, what would it be. Jennifer says that after today, she would give herself a B. The LC’s ask for hg feedback. Josie and Kim say positives. The they ask if Jennifer should stay or go. Of course they all think she should stay. Now it is Iyanla’s turn. She says that this is hard. She says that Jennifer has made a 180 degree turnaround and that is AAA work, but she has figured out how to manipulate the system and she thinks Jennifer is now just focused on how to graduate. Jennifer says that she realizes today that she is able to talk about her dad’s past but that it is still painful to think of her actual relationship with him. Iyanla says that Jennifer is on the verge on a total breakthrough and that Jennifer has to be willing to feel the pain in order to heal. Jennifer reads a paper she wrote about what she is felling and done. Everyone is crying. Iyanla asks Jennifer what she wants. She answers to heal and her other standard answers and Iyanla tells her not to look away from her and to tell her what she wants and Jennifer finally admits that she wants her father to love her. The hg’s are just crying their eyes out. Rhonda has her clipboard and says to Iyanla that she thinks that maybe they should change their minds about they had talked about before the BOR and Iyanla says that she doesn’t know (you can tell they are messing with Jennifer) and Rhonda says she knows that she is the nice sweet LC but she thinks that they should change their minds. Iyanla has her clipboard up and says that since Jennifer has stepped up to the task, she gives her an A+. Poor Jennifer is so drained from the whole process that she is barely able to smile. Rhonda tells Josie to go get Chloe.
Rhonda and Iyanla have a good time reviewing Chloe. Telling her that she needs to stay focused on what they are saying and asking her what she still needs to work on, they say walking. It is all tongue in cheek. Then they tell Chloe that she will probably need to stay in the house the rest of her life so they can tell her that they love her and review her on a regular basis. Josie and Chloe sit down and Iyanla asks Josie if she thinks that she is properly dressed for a BOR and Josie says yes she has slacks on. (and a tank top and funky hat). So Rhonda and Iyanla tell her to go up to the podium. I think they are yanking her chain too at this point. They ask her what she has done well and they ask the hg’s what she has improved on and they all say her tantrums and being open. Rhonda tells her that she is graduating and Josie and Chloe are graduating at 4pm that day. Wow, that is quick. Cassie is sad to see Josie go. Josie calls her mom and she is crying and calling her mom to tell her she is coming home. Rhonda saying in confessional that the women are in for a big surprise when they see who is coming for Josie’s graduation.

Preview- They have the graduation party for Josie and Chloe has on the outfit that Grandma had got her. Then it says that the party takes an ugly turn and it shows Josie running through the house with Chloe and then at the ambulance saying that her breathing sounded horrible. Towanda gets devastating news.

Friday's Show, Nov 12th

Friday's show starts with Towanda on the phone with Andre. They are talking about Sommer and then T asks Andre what is the most racist statement you can make? And he immediately replied, “I have black friends.” She says, “that’s right.”
Sommer in confessional saying she doesn’t understand why T is so mad, she doesn’t know what she said to tick her off.
Iyanla calls Towanda and tells her that her assignment for the day is to hide something from Josie today and then to see how she reacts. So Towanda hides Josie’s wallet and then the car keys. Josie is supposed to meet Rhonda at a café. Josie is looking for her wallet and Kim and T are helping. She gets frustrated but she doesn’t blow. Kim says that she will just give her some money so she won’t be late and then they will look for it when she gets back. So Josie goes out to the van and sees that the keys are not in it and heads back to the house. T walks down the hallway and tells her that she found her wallet for her and then Josie is saying that the keys are gone. So they start looking for them. Josie doesn’t blow but the girl has a potty mouth. Turns out the house has a brand new van and Josie is the first to drive it. T “finds” the keys and Josie leaves. Josie is at the café waiting for Rhonda and Rhonda calls and says that she is running late. Josie turns around and there is a tow truck getting ready to drive away with the van. Josie begs him not to take the van and she is crying and of course he backs down. She cried and cussed but didn’t blow. Rhonda calls and says she can’t make it and will see her later. Josie says she better cause she has stuff to tell her. Then the guy in the chicken suit shows up and he starts bugging Josie and he has a basket with eggs in and he “accidently” dumps these raw eggs at Josie’s feet. Then as she is getting in the van, he comes around and gives her a hug. She is laughing and as she drives off she is yelling in the van, “I can’t believe this day, it is like everyone is out to get me” But she never blew a gasket. When she gets home, Rhonda meets with her and tells her that it was all a set up. Josie laughs and Rhonda says that she wants to consciously think about how she chooses to react to situations and to know that how she reacts does affect Chloe. So later that day she went to a parent support group meeting. She goes to the group and they ask her how does Chloe push her buttons and she says that sometimes when she wants Chloe to go to bed and she won’t that she gets really upset and yells. The other parents there give her supporting feedback and Josie says that she got a lot out of it.
Group meeting- Rhonda asks Sommer how her date went and Sommer said it went very well and she had a good time. Rhonda says she can’t wait to hear how much fun the hg’s had picking her date. They are all sitting there so somber. Kim starts and says she liked Howard but that he was 39 and thought that might be too old so she went with Chris. Josie says that she liked Howard because even though he was older he was much more sensitive and that he looked a lot like Marcus. Towanda says that she liked Chris and Howard both too. Rhonda says, “than how did you decide Chris in the end if you liked them both?” (oh boy, here we go!) And they say that Jennifer told them that she had a conversation with Sommer and that she would want to go out with Chris and not Howard. Rhonda turns to Jennifer and Jennifer tells Sommer, “you take it from here because I do not want to be in the middle of this.” Sommer starts to talk and Towanda jumps in and says, “It was because Howard was black.” Sommer in voice over saying, “I’m really thinking that I didn’t do anything more than state a preference and I am not understanding why anybody is upset with me over that.” Sommer says in group that she was just saying that if she gets a choice that she would prefer to go out with a white man since that is probably who she would be dating in the future.” Rhonda asked Towanda how that made her feel. T responded, “pi$$ed off. Because if she felt that way, why didn’t she think it was okay to share that with everyone instead of making it into a secret. And that made it seem racial to me which is prejudice.” Sommer said that she didn’t say it as a secret, but just stating a preference.” T tells her that she could have taken 30 seconds and come to her and told her, but she didn’t. It may not have been a big deal to you but it is to me. You have stated that you think black men are possessive and have greasy hair.” Sommer says that she is surprised that she stated that out loud but it is true. She doesn’t like the feel of back men’s hair. But she still thinks this is just a preference and not being prejudiced.” Towanda says that there is a difference between being racist and prejudiced. Prejudice is being judgemental and T says that she was surprised that Sommer would judge someone like that when she knows what it is like to be judged from being fat. Sommer responds that she understands and that she realizes that she has been judgemental in the past and she was working on that. Rhonda asks Sommer if she heard what T was saying when she compared the two. And Sommer says yes and T says then why not come to the source of it, me in the house? Sommer is crying and she tells T that when she arrived at the house T had told her that she just says things and they come out of her mouth with out thinking and that is why she specifically did not go to T because she knew that it would come out wrong and she has already been through that with T. She is shaking her head yes at her. Sommer in confessional saying that she is realizing that she has these issues that she didn’t even know she had. Rhonda tells the women that they have brought up hard issues into the open and talked about them and that is the first step in healing and she is proud of them. She then tells T that she doesn’t want her to feel all the burden of the race issue. T in confessional saying that she has dealt with racism and prejudice every day of her life. Later in the show T explains to Kim the Dim that racism is feeling that your race is superior to all other races. Prejudice is judging someone by the color of their skin. She feels that Sommer is prejudiced. Kim says that she hopes T will help Sommer with this and T shakes her head yes.
Speaking of being judgemental, Cassie the new house mate arrives and the first words out of Kim’s mouth in confession cam are, “She has big hair and she just looks kind of country and I can tell she has had a hard life.” (I’m sorry but that was way judgemental and RUDE! Of course my first impression of her was she has that tiny voice like Jennifer’s and now there will be two of them talking like little girls. But I thought it in a nice way! Really! Ha ha) Cassie’s story is a sad one ladies. Lets go to the plasma screen. The first picture is of the house she grew up in. She was adopted by her aunt and uncle when she was 3 yrs old and it was an alcoholic household and all that goes with it. The they show a door and it was to a small apartment off the house and it was here that a family member tried to rape her when she was 15. But she got away. She said she could no longer handle being around people so she quit going to school and she would go to that apartment and just sit in the corner for 8 hours. Then when the incompletes started coming in she just quit school at 16. She started drinking at the age of 14. It was so bad that she would have to drink some vanilla extract or mouthwash just so she would be able to make it to the liquor store. Rhonda asks her what her final straw was and she said she went to buy a bottle of wine and she saw a lady she had met in AA so she hid til she left. When she got home she saw the womans face in the bottom of that bottle with every drank she took and could hear her telling her that she had to stop drinking. She hasn’t drank since. Then we see a picture of a leaf and it represents how a leaf dries up and just crumbles and that is how she felt when she gave her son up for adoption 18 years ago. When she found out she was pregnant she had already broken up with the father, so she saw an ad in the paper for a couple looking to adopt and they flew her to Oregon and she lived with them for the last two months of her pregnancy and the father signed off on his rights. Rhonda asked her why she decided on adoption and she said she knew she had no way of supporting this child and she didn’t want him to be brought up like she was. Then we see Josie in confession cam saying she has no empathy for Cassie, cause she is living it everyday and she is making the best of it. (okay this is a sensitive topic to me. Once again we have the judging and yet they crucify Sommer, but Kim and Josie just keep on riding their high horses. At least Sommer wants to learn from it and become a better person. I applaud Cassie in having the sense to do this. She was an alcoholic and she said that only reason she didn’t drink at the end of her pregnancy was because she was living with the adoptive parents. Adoption is NOT a crime Josie and just because you chose to keep your child does not make you a better person, you made a different choice. Because there are a lot of us out here that are still not so sure you are going to do all that great of a job with Chloe. But we are trying to keep an open mind and hope that you will. Okay I am done, thank you for listening to my rant.) A week after her son was born she left. She came back when he was 3 yrs. old to see him and they had never told him that he was adopted. So Cassie decided she would wait until he was 18 to talk to him. He is now 18. She wrote a letter for his adoptive parents to give him before she approaches him.
Iyanla and Rhonda are fascinated with the fact that Cassie’s goals are tied to each of the other house mates goals. Then we see her self portrait. There is a butterfly that is being pushed down and she thinks it represents her self worth and responsibility. So Cassie’s goals are to get her GED and reconnect with her son. I think if I did the math right she is 41.

Sommer, Jennifer, Kim and Towanda are playing cards. T and Jen don’t look happy at all. In voice over Sommer says that she is still surprised that her choices have caused such a problem and that she still doesn’t understand it, but she knows that with T it is big and she really doesn’t want to lose that friendship that they have worked so hard to forge.

Cassie meets with Rhonda and they put together her steps, they are-define expectations, pursue GED, claim self worth and honor love for son. They are leaving the 5th one open.
Rhonda says in confession cam that she thinks Cassie wants to earn her son’s love by being a person she is proud to be and then he can be proud of her.

Sommer and Towanda are sitting on the foyer steps talking. Sommer is telling T that she just didn’t get it, but she is trying to now and that the one thing she feels bad about is the hair statement. T tells her that that is okay because that is a preference. T says that she doesn’t like dreadlocks on men, but her sister Traci does. That is her preference. T tells her that she is known for holding grudges and that isn’t happening and for her, that is big. T tells Sommer that she appreciates the honesty and that helps. Sommer says in confession cam that the day has been one big epiphany for her and she looks forward to working on being so judgemental. (It looks like this is turning into a good thing for the two of them and there will be a lot of growth for both of them because of this. I applaud both Sommer and Towanda for their honesty and the willingness to talk and work it through. I was so glad to see a happy end to this.)
We see Cassie unpacking and in confession cam she says it has been quite and a day and she knows that when she wakes up tomorrow she is one step closer to meeting her son. Then we see Cassie kneeling at her bed praying before going to sleep.

Preview-
Turns out the ambulance comes for Chloe. Josie is running through the house with Chloe saying “listen to her, she can’t breathe.” We see Josie sitting in the ambulance with Chloe. And yet Chloe looks her ever unfazed self. We see Cassie crying and it was hard to understand her. Towanda appears to still be upset about the whole racism/prejudice subject, so the LC”s all show up to intervene. It appears Jennifer goes up to the BOR and she is crying and Iyanla is in her face saying “What do you want Jennifer, come on tell me, what do you want!”

Thursday's Show Spoiler

Thursday 11/11
Maureen is packing to leave.
Iyanla comes and she has a puzzle shaped like a heart with a picture of Towanda on it. Of course they “break it” and then Towanda has to put it back together. And on the back of each piece she has words she has to write on them such as love, trust and forgive.

Group meeting and Rhonda calls up Maureen. What do the ladies think that Maureen has gained on her second visit to the SO house? T nailed it by saying she has let go of her guilt and T said she thinks it has helped her to start letting go of her own guilt. Sommer is in charge of a going away gift for the shower they are giving Maureen before she leaves.
Now its Sommers turn. What are Sommers challenges in romance. Jennifer said she is very negative. Towanda says she dislikes Sommers attitude against herself. Rhonda asks what she needs to do and the women all say that she needs to start dating. Sommer has said in the past that she picks bad dates and since she is a bad “picker”, Rhonda tells her that she is going on a blind date that night and the hg’s are picking him. They are working with a matchmaker and I guess they might get to interview potential candidates too.

Sommer is feeling overwhelmed by all the women giving her suggestions on what to give Maureen. Sommer calls Rhonda in tears and Rhonda tells her to just get the picture they had taken and have it framed. While Sommer is driving around they have added this audio of all these voices at once to show how overwhelmed she is.
They have a shower for Maureen and she is getting gift certificates from the show to stores and one is for window treatments. One of the gift certificates is for $1000. She got some kind of mattress too. She loves the picture and they toast her with champagne. Rhonda says in confession cam that she knows that secretly Maureen really wants to stay. But I think she got better going away gifts this time. Anyone remember what she got when she graduated last season? I will miss Mo, she reminds me of Mom, a lot.

Sommer is laying on the floor. Rhonda goes in and asks if there is an ice pack in the fridge and they show Kim and Josie standing in kitchen and Kim rolls her eyes. Sometimes she forgets to fake til she makes it. Rhonda puts ice on her neck and Maureen gets down by her and whispers in her ear that she will miss her the most. Sommer says she is going to make her cry.

The women meet the matchmakers and they tell her that she needs to have someone that is open and that Sommer has never been romanced. Josie says that between her crush on Marcus and her friend Ed that was here, she seems to favor men with darker complexions.

Jennifer goes to work out with Sommer. Sommer tells Marcus about her upcoming blind date and that she thinks the women are using him as an example of the type of man she is attracted to. Marcus is laughing and saying, “me?” He seems flattered.

Jennifer and Sommer are in the van coming home and the conversation is basically that Sommer says that she doesn’t know what kind of man they are going to pick for her but she wants Jennifer to know that Marcus is a special case. Jennifer says, “you just want to hump him.” Sommer says no he is special because more often than not, she is not attracted to them. Jennifer says she doesn’t know what to tell her and Sommer says that she is telling her that if it comes into play. Jennifer clarifies and says, “so what you are saying is unless he is cute and looks like Marcus, pass on him.Jennifer tells her that she won’t set her up with an ugly guy and Sommer says “Well its not even ugly, I mean-what I’m saying is most of the time black guys tend to be a little bit, They need mom, Mama. Seriously.”
Towanda meets with Iyanla and she has her puzzle put back together. T tells Iyanla that when she got done she felt naked, raw. She felt like she had taken something off. Iyanla asks T if her heart is open. Iyanla asks her how she mends a broken heart. T says that she knows she must forgive. Iyanla asks why she hasn’t done it yet. So Towanda has to write a letter to her dad and ask for his forgiveness.

The matchmakers bring the men to be interviewed. Boy, they look pretty darn buff. Gee I think she would be really intimidated by these guys. The first guy is a smaller blonde guy and T says in confession cam that he might be okay, she doesn’t like bachelor #2 (who sounds like Marlon Brando in Godfather) Bachelor #3 is Howard, who is a tall African American male. He says that he thinks he is like a black Dr. Phil. He says momma didn’t raise no fool. Bachelor #1 Chris is fun. They leave and the hg’s start discussing who to pick. Josie, Towanda and Kim all like Howard. (JMO, neither Chris or Howard are going to be Sommer’s type. Sommer out weighs Chris by 50 pounds. And I don’t mean that mean, but he is a slender guy. Howard is very buff and pretty darn good looking. But Bachelor #2 would also be a disaster because he was just really weird.) Jennifer is saying that she likes Chris and that she and Sommer had a conversation in the van and from that conversation she knows that Sommer would rather go out with Chris. And she is making eyes at Kim. Jennifer says that Sommer will have to tell them what the conversation was, but that they need to pick Chris. T is in confession cam saying that Jennifer is speaking in “code” to Kim but that Kim isn’t catching on and T is. T says in confession cam that she catches on that the code is that Jennifer is against Howard because he is black. T is angry now. And Kim is the only one that is so dense that she still hasn’t caught on. Josie gets it and so does Towanda. Josie tries to get Jennifer to tell them what the conversation was that makes her so in favor of Chris over Howard. Jennifer says that she can’t and they will have to ask Sommer later that night.

The women call the men back in and tell Chris that they picked him. They tell the other guys that they admire them for going through all this for them. Jennifer goes down to get Sommer and on the way up the steps Jennifer whispers and giggles that she wouldn’t let them pick the black guy. Josie meets them at the top of the stairs and she is not happy and she asks Sommer if she didn’t want to date a black guy? Sommer tells her that she has dated black guys in the past and it hasn’t worked out and she just has a sour taste about it right now. Josie says “even if it is just for practice and he was the more sensual, emotional, softer type of person?”Sommer says she thinks it is just safer to go. Josie walks away. Jennifer is smiling and acting totally oblivious that this is starting a big controversy in the house.

Jennifer is putting in a load of laundry and Josie is standing there and Jennifer says the conversation was about Sommer and Josie says, “No, its about racism. But lets just end this now, so it doesn’t affect Sommers date.”

Josie and Towanda are in Josie’s room and Josie is telling Towanda that she told Jennifer that basing the whole decision to pick Chris over Howard because of skin color was wrong they just don’t seem to get it and T doesn’t really believe that. Towanda said the talking in code shows how Jennifer knew it was wrong and that she was the only one who got it and Josie said no that she got it too (and she did) and T said that she got it because she has lived it. Towanda says, “the only reason Sommer has a crush on Marcus is because he is safe. She wouldn’t actually date him. How dare she! Because racism is prejudice and prejudice is judgmental and judging someone because of the color of their skin is wrong and she ought to know better because she has been judged because she was fat.”

Jennifer goes to T and says that she would hope that Towanda would tell her what she did to make her so mad because she just doesn’t get it. She acts totally oblivious. T tells her that she will come to her later after she has had a chance to cool down because she is just way too mad to talk to her right now. Jennifer has that fake smile plastered on her face and says okay, cause she just has no idea.

Sommer goes on the date and they seem to have a good time. She calls the house and Towanda answers the phone and when she hears Sommer’s voice she asks what she wants and Sommer says she just wanted to let them know that the date is going really well and Towanda just drops the phone in the chair and tells Kim to get Jennifer. Kim comes to the phone and tells Sommer that Jennifer is asleep and Sommer tells her that she didn’t ask for Jennifer and why did T just put the phone down. So Kim asks her how the date is going and Sommer says great and then she asks if everything is cool and Kim just stands there for a little bit and then Kim stammers around and says the she is not getting in the middle of this and to enjoy her date and she would see her later.

When Sommer gets home she goes to Jennifer’s room and Jennifer is laying in bed saying that she is just sick of all the drama and she just wants to sleep. Sommer says, “So am I the prejudiced b**ch now?”
Kim in confession cam saying that she is afraid that this will cause T to leave. Each time you see T in confession cam she is getting madder and madder. T says that she deals with it every day of her life, but she never thought she would have to deal with it here.

Preview- In group Towanda says to Sommer, “its not a big deal to you, but it is to me. How can you make a judgement of someone based on the color of their skin?”
Josie is at an outdoor café and there is a person dressed as a large chicken there. The voice over says that Josie is about to lose her patience and you hear her tell some one that they are not going to tow that car (the van) and she is in confession cam saying that everyone is out to get her today.
The new houseguest arrives and the voice over says, “but not everyone is happy with what she has to say.” Josie in confessional saying, “I am having trouble empathizing”

Thursday November 11

Here's the spoiler for November 11th:

Maureen is packing to leave.
Iyanla comes and she has a puzzle shaped like a heart with a picture of Towanda on it. Of course they “break it” and then Towanda has to put it back together. And on the back of each piece she has words she has to write on them such as love, trust and forgive.

Group meeting and Rhonda calls up Maureen. What do the ladies think that Maureen has gained on her second visit to the SO house? T nailed it by saying she has let go of her guilt and T said she thinks it has helped her to start letting go of her own guilt. Sommer is in charge of a going away gift for the shower they are giving Maureen before she leaves.
Now its Sommers turn. What are Sommers challenges in romance. Jennifer said she is very negative. Towanda says she dislikes Sommers attitude against herself. Rhonda asks what she needs to do and the women all say that she needs to start dating. Sommer has said in the past that she picks bad dates and since she is a bad “picker”, Rhonda tells her that she is going on a blind date that night and the hg’s are picking him. They are working with a matchmaker and I guess they might get to interview potential candidates too.

Sommer is feeling overwhelmed by all the women giving her suggestions on what to give Maureen. Sommer calls Rhonda in tears and Rhonda tells her to just get the picture they had taken and have it framed. While Sommer is driving around they have added this audio of all these voices at once to show how overwhelmed she is.
They have a shower for Maureen and she is getting gift certificates from the show to stores and one is for window treatments. One of the gift certificates is for $1000. She got some kind of mattress too. She loves the picture and they toast her with champagne. Rhonda says in confession cam that she knows that secretly Maureen really wants to stay. But I think she got better going away gifts this time. Anyone remember what she got when she graduated last season? I will miss Mo, she reminds me of Mom, a lot.

Sommer is laying on the floor. Rhonda goes in and asks if there is an ice pack in the fridge and they show Kim and Josie standing in kitchen and Kim rolls her eyes. Sometimes she forgets to fake til she makes it. Rhonda puts ice on her neck and Maureen gets down by her and whispers in her ear that she will miss her the most. Sommer says she is going to make her cry.

The women meet the matchmakers and they tell her that she needs to have someone that is open and that Sommer has never been romanced. Josie says that between her crush on Marcus and her friend Ed that was here, she seems to favor men with darker complexions.

Jennifer goes to work out with Sommer. Sommer tells Marcus about her upcoming blind date and that she thinks the women are using him as an example of the type of man she is attracted to. Marcus is laughing and saying, “me?” He seems flattered.

Jennifer and Sommer are in the van coming home and the conversation is basically that Sommer says that she doesn’t know what kind of man they are going to pick for her but she wants Jennifer to know that Marcus is a special case. Jennifer says, “you just want to hump him.” Sommer says no he is special because more often than not, she is not attracted to them. Jennifer says she doesn’t know what to tell her and Sommer says that she is telling her that if it comes into play. Jennifer clarifies and says, “so what you are saying is unless he is cute and looks like Marcus, pass on him.Jennifer tells her that she won’t set her up with an ugly guy and Sommer says “Well its not even ugly, I mean-what I’m saying is most of the time black guys tend to be a little bit, They need mom, Mama. Seriously.”
Towanda meets with Iyanla and she has her puzzle put back together. T tells Iyanla that when she got done she felt naked, raw. She felt like she had taken something off. Iyanla asks T if her heart is open. Iyanla asks her how she mends a broken heart. T says that she knows she must forgive. Iyanla asks why she hasn’t done it yet. So Towanda has to write a letter to her dad and ask for his forgiveness.

The matchmakers bring the men to be interviewed. Boy, they look pretty darn buff. Gee I think she would be really intimidated by these guys. The first guy is a smaller blonde guy and T says in confession cam that he might be okay, she doesn’t like bachelor #2 (who sounds like Marlon Brando in Godfather) Bachelor #3 is Howard, who is a tall African American male. He says that he thinks he is like a black Dr. Phil. He says momma didn’t raise no fool. Bachelor #1 Chris is fun. They leave and the hg’s start discussing who to pick. Josie, Towanda and Kim all like Howard. (JMO, neither Chris or Howard are going to be Sommer’s type. Sommer out weighs Chris by 50 pounds. And I don’t mean that mean, but he is a slender guy. Howard is very buff and pretty darn good looking. But Bachelor #2 would also be a disaster because he was just really weird.) Jennifer is saying that she likes Chris and that she and Sommer had a conversation in the van and from that conversation she knows that Sommer would rather go out with Chris. And she is making eyes at Kim. Jennifer says that Sommer will have to tell them what the conversation was, but that they need to pick Chris. T is in confession cam saying that Jennifer is speaking in “code” to Kim but that Kim isn’t catching on and T is. T says in confession cam that she catches on that the code is that Jennifer is against Howard because he is black. T is angry now. And Kim is the only one that is so dense that she still hasn’t caught on. Josie gets it and so does Towanda. Josie tries to get Jennifer to tell them what the conversation was that makes her so in favor of Chris over Howard. Jennifer says that she can’t and they will have to ask Sommer later that night.

The women call the men back in and tell Chris that they picked him. They tell the other guys that they admire them for going through all this for them. Jennifer goes down to get Sommer and on the way up the steps Jennifer whispers and giggles that she wouldn’t let them pick the black guy. Josie meets them at the top of the stairs and she is not happy and she asks Sommer if she didn’t want to date a black guy? Sommer tells her that she has dated black guys in the past and it hasn’t worked out and she just has a sour taste about it right now. Josie says “even if it is just for practice and he was the more sensual, emotional, softer type of person?”Sommer says she thinks it is just safer to go. Josie walks away. Jennifer is smiling and acting totally oblivious that this is starting a big controversy in the house.

Jennifer is putting in a load of laundry and Josie is standing there and Jennifer says the conversation was about Sommer and Josie says, “No, its about racism. But lets just end this now, so it doesn’t affect Sommers date.”

Josie and Towanda are in Josie’s room and Josie is telling Towanda that she told Jennifer that basing the whole decision to pick Chris over Howard because of skin color was wrong they just don’t seem to get it and T doesn’t really believe that. Towanda said the talking in code shows how Jennifer knew it was wrong and that she was the only one who got it and Josie said no that she got it too (and she did) and T said that she got it because she has lived it. Towanda says, “the only reason Sommer has a crush on Marcus is because he is safe. She wouldn’t actually date him. How dare she! Because racism is prejudice and prejudice is judgmental and judging someone because of the color of their skin is wrong and she ought to know better because she has been judged because she was fat.”

Jennifer goes to T and says that she would hope that Towanda would tell her what she did to make her so mad because she just doesn’t get it. She acts totally oblivious. T tells her that she will come to her later after she has had a chance to cool down because she is just way too mad to talk to her right now. Jennifer has that fake smile plastered on her face and says okay, cause she just has no idea.

Sommer goes on the date and they seem to have a good time. She calls the house and Towanda answers the phone and when she hears Sommer’s voice she asks what she wants and Sommer says she just wanted to let them know that the date is going really well and Towanda just drops the phone in the chair and tells Kim to get Jennifer. Kim comes to the phone and tells Sommer that Jennifer is asleep and Sommer tells her that she didn’t ask for Jennifer and why did T just put the phone down. So Kim asks her how the date is going and Sommer says great and then she asks if everything is cool and Kim just stands there for a little bit and then Kim stammers around and says the she is not getting in the middle of this and to enjoy her date and she would see her later.

When Sommer gets home she goes to Jennifer’s room and Jennifer is laying in bed saying that she is just sick of all the drama and she just wants to sleep. Sommer says, “So am I the prejudiced b**ch now?”
Kim in confession cam saying that she is afraid that this will cause T to leave. Each time you see T in confession cam she is getting madder and madder. T says that she deals with it every day of her life, but she never thought she would have to deal with it here.

Preview- In group Towanda says to Sommer, “its not a big deal to you, but it is to me. How can you make a judgement of someone based on the color of their skin?”
Josie is at an outdoor café and there is a person dressed as a large chicken there. The voice over says that Josie is about to lose her patience and you hear her tell some one that they are not going to tow that car (the van) and she is in confession cam saying that everyone is out to get her today.
The new hg arrives and the voice over says, “but not everyone is happy with what she has to say.” Josie in confessional saying, “I am having trouble empathizing”

Tuesday October 5th Spoiler

Here's the spoiler for Tuesday October 5th:

>b>Sinae has picked Jennifer to take out to breakfast. They are walking to the bus stop and Jennifer is saying that she doesn’t do publice transportation. Sinae says if they are lucky they will see one crazy person to talk about and Jennifer says that crazy people kidnap people and Sinae says that if that happens they will stand in the middle of the street and hail a cab. Sinae basically tells Jennifer to buck up. Jennifer is impressed with how well Sinae is able to get around on the bus.
Kim calls Iyanla and asks if she can have a reprieve today since her daughters are coming. Kim tells Iyanla that she will just wear a little make up and will tone herself down. Iyanla in confession saying that she knows there is more to this than what Kim says. But Iyanla says that she can have a reprieve today but she is back to sweats and no make up the next day. (I think Kim is embarrassed for her daughters to see her like that). As soon as Kim hangs up she tells Towanda that get got a reprieve and throws her sweat shirt at her and says she is going to put so much make up on she will look like a hooker. Towanda yells that it is 920am and Kim is running off.
Sommer meets with Rhonda and they talk about her being a people pleaser. Sommer says she doesn’t understand what the difference is between being a people please and just being nice. Rhonda said that this assignment should make it clear to her. Sommer has to be the ultimate people pleaser. So she is dressed like a 50’s housewife and she has to be the ultimate people pleaser.
Kim is downstairs slathering on makeup and tearing clothes out of her closet and Iyanla calls. In confession cam Iyanla says she is calling to check to see exactly what a “little bit” of makeup and jewelry and whatever is going to look like. (See Kim has already lied and told Iyanla she was just going to put on a little and then hung up the phone and told Towanda she was going to look like a hooker.)
So Iyanla asks Kim why she wants to wear her stuff. Kim says it is two-fold. One she wants to see if it feels different to her and secondly, she will be out with her daughters and she wants to wear her wedding ring and she wants to know what time it is.
Iyanla tells her that she still thinks Kim wants her mask to hide her ugliness from her daughters and of course Kim “isn’t feeling it”. Kim says it has been 7 days and she doesn’t feel any different today than if she had been able to wear her stuff the last 7 days. Iyanla tries to explain to her that that is the problem. She isn’t feeling.
Sinae and Jennifer are heading home and they are walking and I guess that Kim was supposed to meet them somewhere to pick them up and they are walking saying, “Come on Kim, where are you?” Then there is Kim and they comment on her having reall clothes on. Kim takes off her sunglasses and asks how her makeup looks and Jennifer says that she thinks Kim looks better without makeup. That didn’t go over well.
Sommer is dusting continuously and offering to do every little thing and they are calling her the stepford wife. Then Kim in confessional says she plans on taking advantage of it and asks Sommer to run the vacuum in the guest room and dust since her daughters are coming.
Sommer fixes lunch for the women and she is really getting on Towanda and Kim’s nerves. (Kim really has a mean streak in her and it is starting to show.) So then we have group and Rhonda asks how it went. Of course none of the women liked it. I think Josie is the only one who found it amusing. Kim just keeps going on and on about how two faced it makes Sommer appear. Then Sommer in confession cam saying she is thinking of the saying, “Thou dost protest too much.” And that She thinks that Kim is not to be trusted.
Towanda meets with Dr. Stan and he asks how she is and she answers “good” and he says “If you are good, then why are you here?” Towanda said that she just meant that she was doing alright not that all was well with her in the house. They talk and it gets around to Towanda saying that she didn’t feel like Iyanla actually listened to her and Dr. Stan told her that she needs to make this known to Iyanla.
Back to group, Rhonda asks the other women how they react to uncomfortable situations and they all say they shut down except for Sommer. Then Kim says that she probably is a people pleaser too. Rhonda tells Sommer to continue on for the rest of the day.
Rhonda asks Kim what her intention is when her daughters are here. Is she going to be real? Kim says she is going to try to. That her daughters have no idea how unhappy she is. So when the meeting ends Rhonda tells Kim to be real. Also Sinae is the first hg to earn a step. She earned her “accept blindness” step.
The women are sitting around and Kim tells Sommer that if she is supposed to do whatever it takes to make her happy then she should tell Iyanla that Kim should be able to have all her stuff for her daughters entire visit. Sommer smiles and said that isn’t possible. (Kim is really getting whacked out). Kim’s two daughters, Chelsea and Snowden finally arrive and they seem surprised that their mom cries when she is hugging them.
Towanda meets with Iyanla and Iyanla wants to discuss the fact that Towanda still does not trust her. Iyanla tells Towanda that she does not accept responsibility and she blames on others when she doesn’t like what she sees. That no matter what Towanda is right and if anyone makes her feel that she is not right than it isn’t Towanda’s fault. Iyanla said she no longer is going to put her heart and soul in to this. She wants Towanda to tell her exactly what she wants her to do and react. Towanda just sits there but in confession cam she says that she thinks Iyanla is just punishing her for being honest with her.
Iyanla comes to meet Kim’s daughters and she walks in and looks at Kim and says, “This is NOT a little bit of anything.” Kim starts arguing that it is. Iyanla tells her to remember that she will be back to her real self the next day and Kim says that this is the real her. Then she acts like it is news to her that she has to go to au natural tomorrow. Iyanla is disgusted and tells Kim that they will talk tomorrow. Kim is in the kitchen talking to Josie and Josie tells her that she thinks that she will lose everything tomorrow. She says that she thinks that Iyanla will physically take her stuff away so that Kim can’t even look at it. Kim is trying to tell Josie that she lived up to the deal she made with Iyanla and they are showing clips of the phone conversation and Kim lied big time. So Kim comes out to her daughters and they ask if she is in trouble and she says yes but she will worry about tomorrow.
Towanda calls her husband and tells him that Iyanla told her that she doesn’t take responsibility and wants to always be right and if she isn’t that she plays the blame game. Her husband tells her that he agrees with Iyanla which really blows her away. She says in confession cam that if her husband agrees with Iyanla then it must be true.
Kim is out shopping with her daughters and Jennifer and Josie are home talking about how Kim just doesn’t get it and they are curious to see how Iyanla reacts tomorrow.
Towanda calls Iyanla and says that she had an epiphany and that she now realizes that it was herself she didn’t trust with Iyanla. In confession cam Towanda says that she is the only one in the house who hasn’t cried.
Rhonda meets with Sommer and Sommer says it was exhausting and time consuming to be such a pleaser and she does not want to do it in life anymore. (a little side note, while Rhonda is talking to Sommer and getting ready to take her make up off, you can see Kim and her daughters outside the window staring in. How rude is that?)
Kim’s daughters tell her that they don’t see the point to the exercise either. Oh I can’t wait to see what happens with Iyanla.
Preview-
The women are in group and Sommer says that she found out that not only had Kim been lying to her that she had also taken something from her.
Iyanla in one on one with Kim telling her that she has to admit that she was dishonest with her. Iyanla says, “You did not misunderstand. You need to take responsibility for it and you were dishonest. You told me a little to get what you wanted and you did not live up to our agreement.” Then you see Kim out somewhere with her daughters and she is on her cell phone saying, “you manipulated, exploited and humiliated me and I don’t want to talk to you right now.”

Why Does Kim Break the Plate?

Iyanla takes away her make-up, jewelry and Louie bag and she is upset. Iyanla suggests she brake a plate. See it next week!

The Swimsuit Incident

In an upcoming episode Jennifer, Sinae and Josie are in the pool, Sommer is just sitting at the side. A comment is made to Josie by Sommer about Josie's swimsuit which is from Josie's heavier days in 8th grade. Sommer makes a comment something like- yeah your boobs were'nt popin' out in 8th grade I bet. Josie immediately regresses to that year when a boyfriend said she was too fat and he wouldn't continue going out with her if she didn't loose weight. She said she lost over 75lbs after his statement. Josie is hurt and feels fat again. Towanda is mad about it, but then again Towanda hates everything about Sommer anyway. Sommer tries to get to know Josie better, but Josie says in a pm that although it was nice of her, she'd rather have her apologize. Later Sommer is looking at the internet picking out a swimsuit to buy Josie that fits, because she says it's the only thing she can think of to apologize.

October Spoilers

From Excite TV listings...Starting Over spoilers!

Monday Oct 04, 2004

Rhonda confronts Josie about her harsh behavior; Kim has not made as much progress as she thought; Jennifer discovers a great deal of fear beneath all of her anger.

Tuesday Oct 05, 2004

A visit from Kim's family threatens her progress; Sommer tries to change her ways; Towanda seems to have a breakthrough; Siane and Jennifer go out for the afternoon.

Wednesday Oct 06, 2004

One of the housemates is accused of theft, leading the other women to question her integrity.

September 22nd Spoiler

Here's a spoiler for the Wednesday, September 22nd show! (thanks TVGal)

Wednesday 9/22
Today’s show starts with Rhonda meeting with Iyanla and Dr. Stan. They agree to have her stay in the house and Dr. Stan alludes to the fact that he thinks there is more to her problem than they know at this point. He thinks it might be chemical (i.e. bi-polar) and Rhonda will meet with her.
Now we go to the house and the women are tiptoeing around the house and whispering that Deborah is packing once again and they are telling each other not to stop her. It appears that everyone is sick of the drama and welcome her leaving. (By Deborah’s body language I think she is hoping to be stopped once again). Deborah calls Rhonda and tells her that she had the best night last night and worst day this night (what?)she knows that she screwed up and instead of chancing her embarrassing her self further and destroying lives she is going to leave. Rhonda tells her that it sounds like Deborah thinks it is about the sex and its not. It is about the lies. Rhonda tells her that she had high hopes for her and she tells her that she has her phone number if she ever needs to call her in an emergency situation and Deborah starts laughing and says, “I don’t, I don’t think this is a subject I will ever re-visit as long as I am black.” She stops laughing and tells Rhonda that she appreciates it, goodbye. (okay, what am I missing? “as long as I am black” I listened to that about 6 times to make sure I understood her. What does that mean? What did race ever have to do with it and if she could change her race, what would be different about her problem. I thought that was a very bizarre thing to say. Any thoughts?) Rhonda wishes her well and they hang up. Rhonda in confession cam saying that Deborah is focusing on the wrong issue and she can’t help her if she won’t see what the real problem is. Iyanla goes to Deborah’s room and says that she heard she was leaving. Deborah is sitting on the floor with a big grin on her face and says, yeah I am leaving. Iyanla asks her if she wants to leave and she says no, but and starts making an excuse. Iyanla stops her and says, “Do you want to leave?” Deborah says no again and Iyanla says that she hears Deborah saying no but she is packing and that is inconsistent. Deborah gets the scolded child look on her face and says, “I didn’t know I had to announce that I had had sex once in the last six years.” Iyanla points out that it is not about the sex it is about the inconsistency in your stories. Iyanla tells her that they all love her no matter what she does and they support her no matter what. Deborah is no longer looking at her and Deborah says that she appreciates that. Iyanla tells her that they are having group now and that as long as she is in the house she is welcome to join them. Deborah stands up and tells her that she appreciates that Iyanla came to talk to her, she didn’t have to do that but that sometimes you make choices and you have to live with it and Iyanla tells her that isn’t true, just make another choice and she hugs her and tells her to make another choice and you see Deborah tear up.
The other women show up for group and Iyanla walks in and Josie tells her she looks good and that leads Iyanla to tell the women to look at Chloe. She says to look and see that Chloe’s hair isn’t combed, she is still in hr pajama’s and she speaks her mind and any thing she wants is handed to her. Wouldn’t we all like to live like that? Iyanls asks Kim why she has her purse with her in group and Kin says it has her stuff in it and Towanda in bent over laughing. So that leads to a discussion about what stuff they feel they have to keep with them. (emotionally) This moves to Towanda talking about not letting go of the pain with her dad and it goes on to Iyanla making her get down and do push ups.
Then we see Deborah calling a cab for 930am (it is 905am now)
Back to group and Towanda says that her dad fell out of love with her. That he chose his girlfriend over her mother and his children. Iyanla asks her if they were rude and disrespectful to the girlfriend and she points out that they may have made their father choose because of the disrespect. She tells her to embrace forgiveness.
Deborah actually gets in the taxi and leaves. Yeah! No more Deborah. (even though she was entertaining and yet irritating to watch. I wish her well and hope she does get help)
Josie meets one on one with Rhonda. Josie is meeting with a career counselor today.
Iyanla takes Towanda to the mall and they sit in the food court and people watch and Iyanla has Towanda judge people according to their appearance. Then after that she tells her that they will meet again that afternoon and Towanda tells her that she is petrified about this next assignment cause she knows everything is cause and effect and she know that she will not like the next part.
The women go down to Kim’s room to see if Deborah is really gone. She is.
Back to Iyanla and Towanda and Iyanla makes her put on the ugly outfit she had worn for the last assignment (your worst nightmare). Towanda is mad.
Rhonda takes Sinae to meet a girl just like her that lives on her own and goes to college and is very independent. Her name is Natatlie and she and Sinae become fast friends. Rhonda leaves and Natalie takes Sinae out to lunch. Sinae is so happy to see what is possible.
The career counselor gives Josie a personality test. (did you know that Josie has two years of college completed? I didn’t know that!)
Iyanla takes Towands to Rodeo Drive to show her that no one cares how she looks and they aren’t judging her and she needs to stop being so judgemental.
Josie calls her Mom and asks her when she wants to come to the house so she can let them know. Her mom tells her to sit down and she says she is and her mom tells her that she has to move. Josie is upset and asks her not to move far and her Mom says she won’t. But that it is a way of life. I don’t understand why she is moving.
Kim is going to bed early to enjoy the short time she is going to have her room to herself. Kim says in confessional that she would be surprised to see Deborah come back.
Preview- The women are asking if Deborah is gone for good. Josie relives a painful childhood memory, She said her mom told her to run away and she is 5 yrs. old and she is outside and she runs. Sinae faces love life problems.

Is Deborah pregnant?

*** SPOILER **

After lashing out a Josie for having unprotected sex, Deborah is overheard in the van talking to a boyfriend. She refers to them celebrating her making the show, a condom breaking, and finished the conversation with 'now we have this'. Later she is heard berating her 15 year old daughter for not getting information on how she can quickly and easily get an abortion. Finally, at the end of the episode, Rhonda asks her point blank,'Are you pregnant?'

Chloe's Father

According to a rumor on the Starting Over message boards, Chloe's father is a 4th guy that was never mentioned.

Rain after she leave the Starting Over House

Someone claiming to know Rain's family stated on the SO boards that Rain moved to Chicago after leaving the house. Here's their statement:

She lives in Chicago and has a three bedroom apartment. I may be wrong but I think she lives near Halstad Street. She enrolled in the winter session and is taking classes at City College. For those of you who were wishing her failuer she has a full time job as a bus driver.

The Senator's Daughter Appears

People Magazine Feb 23 issue states that Sen. Tom Harkin of Iowa's oldest daughter Amy 27 will be on the show later this month.